I’m sorry, but i think i deserve an explanation from you.

And i can’t believe you haven’t stepped up and done it yet. It’s friken ridiculous. I’m supposed to be one of your closest friends. In fact, i’m one of your best friends, but lately it hasn’t even seemed like it. I got so used to being around you all the time and talking to you everyday. Telling you every small insignificant part of my day. Sometimes something happens, and i want to tell you because you used to be the first person i told, but i don’t anymore because i feel like a bother. If i really was someone you cared about, i would actually be worth the truth and not have to keep waiting over something so damn stupid which is telling me how you feel. You’d actually care about how the fuck i’m feeling as well, and actually come talk to me. Not distance yourself and make me feel like complete crap for these past months. Not keep running away from the problem and wait forever and feel secure on when the hell to tell me. At this point i’m not even sad anymore, i’m just angry and upset. Towards many things. And lately i have been sad. I’ve never felt like that before, ever and it’s so horrible. I don’t even feel like myself. I tried talking to you, i did. I showed you how much i cared, and i cared so damn much. A little bit too much at a point where sometimes i forgot to care about myself and how i was feeling. I put your feelings in front of mine, and never even gave two shits about myself. I mean, i feel like i contradict myself a bit too because i also haven’t been straightforward. Or maybe i didn’t try hard enough? Or maybe fight hard enough for you to stay and actually make something work? But honestly i don’t care anymore. I know if i were to bring this up to you, you’d just be like “what’s there to talk about”. So i’ll let you come up and talk to me, and see what the hell you have to say. I’ll let you build the courage like i did in November, and actually have the strength to face me and ask me how i feel. I’ve just been waiting for the day where you can actually man up, and tell me how you’ve been feeling and not have ME keep talking to you. Just man up already and friken tell me so everything can be done, and you can continue to ignore me like you have been. I don’t mean anything to you anymore, and if i do, you haven’t even showed it and it fucking hurts. I feel like our friendship is just scarred for life now. And it friken sucks.

I quit

  1. martinhoangphotography said: Hey we’ve talked about this before. If he ain’t gunna come around then move on. Don’t waste your time over one boy when there is 6 billion more out there. You’re still young, there is no such thing as “the one” in highschool.
  2. stephaneeezy posted this